THERE ARE MANY TYPES OF FEAR, BUT YOUR THOUGHTS CAN ALTER YOUR ENTIRE LIFE WHEN YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO!
Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night with cold sweats scared of taking on the next day?
Your thoughts have taken control, and within no time you are wondering who will call with a problem, what mistakes will you make today, what if you ruin the food tomorrow night at the dinner party?
The days keep passing and the fear starts to increase. You wake up in the morning, walk to your kitchen stand for a second and wonder, do I really have time to make coffee? Maybe I should have woken up earlier? What am I going to do? I need to get ready! I don’t know what to wear and all of a sudden a normal morning filled with so much promise has turned into a nightmare, and the worst part is the day has not even started yet.
Fear becomes crippling, with the family of depression, anxiety and panic it is like the glue that brings it all together. Your worst fears brought to life, every doubt you have in your head about being a person, mother, daughter, father, son. Who will you disappoint this time, what will go wrong, who will see you as a failure? After all you know the truth and in your head that is what you are.
You look at other people and wonder how? How do they live functional lives? They work, get kids to school and they can still smile and handle it all. Why can’t I be like this?
Easier said than done? No it’s not, it is possible but it is also a CHOICE. It’s not easy but it is possible!
YOU NEED TO GET BUSY, PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY BUSY!
At this point you are probably thinking what do they know, what validity does this article have? Let me tell you my story.
I have suffered for years with depression, anxiety, panic attacks and incredible fear that stopped me from living my life!
It only takes one event to alter the way you live, think, talk or treat people. In my case it was several events that led up to the most incredible fear that I had ever felt. The thoughts in my head of things that could fail in my life, crippled me.
I am a mom, I wondered what would happen if I raised my kids wrong, so many people had advise and comments about every situation that I no longer had any idea what to think. I started out a confident mom, and within no time I was second questioning myself, on everything.
I am a wife to a man who loves me very much, but I doubted every feeling he had for me. I did not believe I was a person who could be loved, I was so insecure about my life and I didn’t feel I deserved any of them, not my husband, not my kids, not a family.
I work, at the time my work became so difficult to do at times. I couldn’t concentrate long enough to get anything done. I would second question myself, everything became terrifying to the point where I couldn’t handle a phone ringing, because I had convinced myself that whatever or whomever was on the other end was bad/negative.
BUT WHAT DO YOU DO NOW? IT’S AT THE POINT WHERE IT’S ALL OR NOTHING. YOU MAKE A DECISION TO GET UP AND FIGHT BACK.
I made the decision that I would no longer be controlled by the fear that had taken over, I would face what crippled me with fear. One day, one step at a time. Rome was not built in a day, and the fear will not go away overnight.
With fear comes a range of other symptoms that affect your daily life, but when you make a decision to not be ruled by fear it becomes liberating!
I started by organizing my day, sticking to a certain timeline everyday. Over and over repeating the same routine. When I would get ready for work, spend time with my kids and/or work I would put my phone on silent and close my emails. Concentrate on what I was doing there and then, if my mind started to wonder I would get up and do something physical walk, talk to my husband or kids or if I was working I would put on my earphones and play really loud happy music.
REMEMBER SMALL STEPS, DAY BY DAY.
I started tackling all my work that I couldn’t deal with, the one thing I have to bring special attention to here, is that everyone wants their work done first and quickly. You need to work with people who have compassion with the way you need to work. Work with people who don’t add to your fear and anxiety levels (Don’t work with people who don’t bring their side, and then drops it all on you at 99.9. It will scare you and cause you to withdraw)
GET BACK TO YOUR HEALTH FIRST!
I worked with many clients, the first thing I did was create certain days that I would work with certain clients. I had certain times that I could not be disturbed at all, and I did not negotiate during those times. The very important factor here, is that if you let it slide once or you stand down and bend the rules once you will be back into old patterns, remind yourself how your fear felt do you really want to return to that moment? for me it was NO!!
Everyday you get stronger, it becomes easier to get up, easier to spend time with the people you love, and you will also find a new appreciation for your work.
SUMMARY OF HOW I OVERCAME MY FEAR! (IT CONTINUES DAILY)
- I removed all distractions from my life
- I decided what was important to me and what caused negativity and procrastination (and removed those elements)
- I setup a very stringent routine
- I changed my health habits, NEVER MISS A MEAL (this can potentially worsen anxiety)
- I started increasing my fitness levels daily
- I made time for my family
- I made time for my personal requirements (I would have quiet time to journal and spend time in bible study)
- I structured my work life and put strict timelines and deadlines in place, I also changed my career
Today I am able to work with various people again, do the work I feared, study and raise my children all while keeping my home under control. Is life perfect? Of course not, but it is manageable, happy and fun. So believe that it gets pretty close.
A VERY IMPORTANT NOTE
No person is the same, some people are stronger than others and there is nothing wrong with that. I once met an amazing life coach that changed my life by changing the way I saw and handled my life. If you need help do not hesitate to find help. You to can live your life to the fullest everyday with all the happiness in the world.
The story above is mine, my struggles and the way I overcame those struggles. I now dedicate my time to assist others finding their best life!
YOUR STRENGTH & HAPPINESS IS WITHIN YOU! BELIEVE IN YOURSELF AND CONQUER YOUR FEAR!
DON’T LET FEAR WIN!